How to Handle Networking Requests Without Overcommitting

You value professionalism and generosity, but sometimes a networking request comes to you out of the blue and the request gives you pause. Maybe you’ve never spoken to this person before, they’re a friend of a friend of a friend, you went to the same school, you’re not familiar with their work, or even you’re new at your current company and are still creating your own reputation among your colleagues. So, what should you do, when you don’t want to be rude? 

Setting Boundaries in Networking

Networking is a powerful tool, but not every request warrants a yes. Being selective with your time and connections is just as important as building new relationships. Trust your instincts—there are moments when declining a request is the best decision for you and your professional reputation.

One key principle of effective networking is reciprocity. A strong network is built on mutual support, not just favors. If someone’s first interaction with you is a request for help—without offering anything in return—it may not be a connection worth pursuing.

Red Flags in Networking Requests

To navigate professional connections wisely, watch out for these causes for concern:

1. The request feels transactional. If someone reaches out solely to pitch a product or service rather than engage in a genuine conversation, it’s okay to decline.

2. Their reputation raises concerns. If a person is known for questionable business practices or others in your network have had negative experiences with them, it’s best to steer clear.

3. They’re asking for too much, too soon. Networking should be about relationship-building. If someone is asking for a job referral or key introduction without prior rapport, that’s a warning sign.

4. You’ve had a negative past experience. If your own interactions with this person have been uncomfortable or unprofessional, you are under no obligation to continue engaging with them.

5. You’re overwhelmed with commitments. If saying yes would stretch you too thin, it’s perfectly reasonable to decline.

How to Politely Decline a Networking Request

Turning down a request doesn’t have to feel awkward. Here are two professional and courteous ways to do so:

Scenario 1: When you may be open to connecting in the future

“Thanks for reaching out! I’m unable to chat right now, but I’d love to stay in touch. Here are some resources that might help with your search. I’ll also be attending [industry event] later this year—perhaps we can connect then.”

Scenario 2: When you want to say no outright

“I appreciate your message. At this time, I’m focusing on building relationships within my existing network and won’t be able to assist, but I wish you the best in your search.”

Networking on Your Terms

Your time and professional reputation are valuable. Thoughtful networking isn’t about saying yes to every request—it’s about fostering meaningful, mutually beneficial connections. By setting clear boundaries and recognizing red flags, you can build a strong network that supports both your personal growth and long-term career success.